Today, I was thinking on the bus (my PPC's battery went dead so I was depressed), and I realized that I'm fucked. I don't think I'll be able to really ever get any kind of girl. I mean, they all want hot stupid guys, not intelligent! I mean, look at this. The Russian chic, when I asked her out, she knew absolutely nothing about me except that I'm Israeli (from having to say "je suis israëlien" so much in French class), yet she turned me down. Obviously, when someone asks someone else out, and that person doesn't know anything about the person that's asking them, they go by looks, there's nothing else to go by. Going by that, I'm fucked. I hate this. I'm used to being the best, always striving for the extra point or mile, always doing my best, and yet, in love life, I suck ass. What can I do? I want to strive for perfection, my usual insane work ethics, but in this case, there's really no way. God damn it!! And they wonder why teen depression is so common!!! The last thing I ever want to do is live single for the rest of my life!!!! *starts crying* The average age in which people lose their virginity is 16; I'm 16 and I haven't even gotten my first fucking kiss (you know I'm mad/sad if I'm swearing a lot)! Today, this girl was complaining that she hasn't gone on a date in 2 weeks, and look at ME!!! NEVER fucking got a date, never got asked out, rarely got any kind of looks from chics (I do sometimes) *starts crying more*. Michael Walker, your story was impactual to me, I feel for your pain, why do girls always complain that guys are picky, but when they get asked out, they say no. WHAT THE FUCK! GIRLS are the picky ones!! They want the fucking "captain of the football team" boyfriend! What can a stupid idiot like that do for them?? NOTHING! Why don't they want someone with matter between their ears!!! I have decided that this week, vacation, that I want to improve my physical appearance to get a chic. I'm planning on asking the metalhead chic out after vacation, and she doesn't know me, so she'll have to go by looks, and I want to maximize my chances of her saying yes. I am popular, everyone knows me, people that I've never seen before know me (today, a little kid ran up to me and say "Warren! I saw you driving 2 days ago in your cool car!" [yes Werner, he said cool car] and I've never even seen the kid). Here's some ways that I'm planning on getting a better chance on getting the chic, haircut (I'll just let the stylist do whatever she wants, I'll just say "I want to ask out this girl, so make me so I have the best chance"), well, that's about it. I know, not much of a list, I have an eyeball doctor appointment, but it's in June. I would also like to increase my muscle mass, but without lifting weights or anything, steriods is easy, but crazy side effects. I think the best way would be to join my friend's band, that'll definately inpress the girls, and then they won't care about muscle mass or crap. The singer now is a friend, but he's really short and a high pitched voice, so I'd do the hardcore screaming, and he'd do the actual singing parts. They don't have any of their own songs yet, and I have some really good ideas for some, I can just make up rythums in my head really easily....ah, I just did and it's awesome, oh sweet! I gotta write this one down, it's really good. See, I write songs good, I can make them up in my head on the spot, I can't make up lyrics, but we can make them together of course. Their band is called "Nihilistic" (ni-hill-istic).
Sorry I didn't separate into paragraphs, I'm too sad and tired now. All I'll say is "son of a!".
