by Warren » Jan 4, 2002 @ 6:35pm
"Geri o shiteimasu" that means "I have diahrea". <br><br>Now for the tail of the Japanese electronic toilet. *sees everyone starting to drool*<br><br>First, you approach the toilet. Then you press a button to raise the seat, so you don't have to use all your energy raising the seat manually. Then you plop your ass on the HEATED, yes, I said HEATED seat. Then a fan will automaticly turn on to pull away any odor. Then, if you choose (this is only on toilets in the lady's room, you can press the "music" button, which makes a river-like sound to muffle your loud farts and stuff, or it may come on automaticly when you sit. Then you do your stuff *FART!*. Don't flush yet! Then you press another button with the picture of an ass on it with water hitting it. You press that, and a pron will extend into the toilet bowl. A jet of warm water hit you in the (with a British accent) perfect spot. You can customize this jet with a million buttons. You can move the jet back and forth to align the jet. You can increase or decrease the power of the jet (when I did it the first time without sitting on the toilet, it shot across the room onto the mirror). You can put it on pulse, and increase or decrease the rate of the pulsation. You can also press the oscollating button to "clean the whole crack". Temperature is also customizable. Then, if you are a girl, there is another button, that aims a little move forward, it didn't work on my toilet, and I'm not a girl, so... After your butt is soaked, you stand up and wipe with toilet paper, but not too much. Then you plop back down on the seat for the drier. The drier is a heat fan inside the toilet that, well, dries your butt. After that, on super super fancy toilets, there's a urine analysis button that takes a sample of your urine and, well, tests it and tells you stuff. After that, if you do that (99% of toilets don't have that), then you can flush. Really you can flush at any time, it depends. Then you press the button to close the seat, and away you go all nice and refreshed. As clean as a baby's butt! It really doesn't take that long. I'd only use the oscollating button and pulse stuff if I did a big one or diahhrea (I ate a piece of raw octopus in Fukusawa fish market on the street, it was freakin' salty and gave me the craps, but only once), otherwise I just did a 2 second squirt with the jet, wipe 'n' dry. OH!! I almost forgot! Once in a while (I only saw one), there will be a seat cleaner. What happens is, you press a button, this nossle comes up and squirts cleaning stuff on the seat. Then a rubber blade goes around the seat to wipe off the cleaning stuff so you have a hot clean toilet seat. The Japanese are extremely obsessive with cleaness. Everything in the bathroom is more advanced than the West. The soap dispensers spray out a foam soap into the sink area, which works better than usual liquid soap, and the hand driers ACTUALLY work! They don't have the American ones, that do crap, but they use "air knives". You put your hands into it, and it shoots a stream of first cold, then hot air on your hands with super pressure, and leaves your hands COMPLETELY COMPLETELY dry!! In only a few seconds!! I was truely amazed. <br><br>Well, there's the toilet story. *sees people still drooling*.<br><br>As for electronics in Japan, they are SOOOOOOOOO far ahead than the US. THEY HAVE VIDEO CELL PHONES!!!!!! The Foma and J-Phone, and EVERYONE has one!! We don't even have normal video phones, and they have video cell phones!! And the video is completely smooth!! That won't be in the US for at least 3 years, and won't get popular for AT LEAST 6 years, because it would require everyone to get one. They have MDLP players, which are mini-disk (MD) players that hold 7 times more than a CD. They also have memory card players, which are super small players that holds memory cards (64Mb and 128Mb, I don't know if there's any larger). I saw really old geezers with MDLPs! Frickin' everyone has one! I wanted one (the MD disks are recordable, you sync the MDLP player with your computer), but they were way too expensive, $200-$300 (or 200-300 EURO!!, which is 24,000-36,000Yen, and I only had 10,000Yen, which is $80). If you are ever in Japan, GO TO AKIHABARA!! That's the electronics capital of the world. That doesn't mean you'll get a good deal, there's just a trillion electronics. And the PPCs are in Japanese! It was fun trying to write Japanese on the writing recognition on the Casio's. There's also many many more Casio models in Japan, the E-750, E-700, BE-300 and other versions of the BE-300-350 (the 300 is in the US), BE-10 to BE-30, and a few others. Oh, and there's no such thing as a normal TV there. EVERYTHING is HDTV. Ok, I gotta wrap this up because I supposed to be doing homework.<br><br>I've been searching for some good Japanese rock, like Japanese heavy metal (like Slipknot), alternative (like Linkin Park), and techno, but I can find very little. There's plenty of pop music, but I want more alternative rock than that. I don't want w-inds, which is the "Japanese boy band". If anyone knows of any current good Japanese bands, please post it. Thanks!
Nippon!
... except a few.... actually.. there are quite a few that i hate.. like our prime minister.. he's such a dork (prime minister = president)<br><br>Oh well.. i need sleep..
